Thursday, August 6, 2015

60 All Out

There are two possible responses to another display of batting ineptitude such as we saw last night.
One is to open a second, third and possibly even a fourth bottle of red.
Not that I'm endorsing binge drinking. It's just that a two-, three- or even four bottle hangover would reduce the sufferer to semi-hibernation and shut down the thought processes.
That way you avoid further consideration of matters that have dominated the thoughts as I've gone on the morning walk for the past couple of weeks.
The only reason they haven't been set out in writing is that I have Other Things That Need To Be Done.
Which is why a monstrous hangover was never going to be part of the agenda.
All out for 60 is another manifestation of the three interlinked issues that have plagued Australian cricket for a while now.
One is the misguided belief that our best eleven is our best eleven is our best eleven. No mention of the phrases under these conditions or on a wicket like this one.
The second is our batsmen's inability to adapt their techniques to changing conditions and differing formats, despite admissions someone hasn't played enough red (or white) ball cricket recently.
Give 'em time, and she'll be apples because our best eleven is our best eleven is our best eleven.
And don't call them batters. Batter is something you put on fish.
Mind you, there is something decidedly fishy about the front foot movement and the dangling bat.
The third is our reluctance to bite the bullet and make the tough decisions. And I'm not just talking about Brad Haddin.
On current considerations, the only members of the batting order who can feel reasonably secure in their positions are Warner, Johnson and Lyon. Everyone else comes with a significant question mark.
Looking at the side from the previous Test:
We already know Chris Rogers is on the verge of retiring.
Smith is not a Three in English conditions when the ball is seaming and swinging. He may not be a Three at all.
Clarke needs runs.
Voges was a short term fix to a temporary issue who hasn't delivered, despite the century on debut.
And Mitch Marsh is not a Six. He could bat Seven, with Nevil at Six.
Nevil is the heir apparent who has done enough to hold his spot, but will have to put up with the Fair Go for Haddin crowd.
Mitchell Johnson is approaching all-rounder status, and the tail is the tail. It's not a bad tail if Lyon has to bat Eleven with Johnson at Eight.
The logical change for this test was the one they made.
But then they didn't go far enough.
Shaun Marsh should have gone into Three. He's an obvious replacement for Rogers when he retires. Not the obvious replacement, but a definite candidate.
For the last three innings, Three has been a virtual opener. Scorelines of 1-7, 1-17 and 1-4 speak for themselves. In every case Smith, supposedly one of the world's top batsmen, has been the next to go at 2-18, 2-62 and 2-10. In that 62 Warner was on 37.
I'm not saying things would have been any better with March there, but they might have been different.
As it was, Warner, Marsh, Voges and Clarke go in quick succession and at 6-39 Hughesy decides against that second bottle and elects the other option.
Which was to turn off the TV.
And it'll be staying off. I've already spent a valuable forty-five minutes nutting this out.
With Other Things That Need To Be Done, having missed much of the last domestic season, since I won't be in a position to watch the forthcoming tour in October, I don't have a great deal (else) to say.